A Cry for Help
In the midst of my constant blogging about interesting things in my life and giving other people suggestions, I’ve got a bit of a switch-up, tonight: I could really use some help, here.
About two months ago, my five-year-old son, David, suddenly became terrified of the dark, of going upstairs by himself, and of going to bed by himself. (He’s our only living son, so he’s been going to bed by himself since he was an infant.) At first, he was afraid of zombies; these days, he’s just plain afraid, ostensibly without the ability to articulate just what it is that scares him. Either way, the problem is the same: we have a lot of trouble getting him to go to bed.
We’ve tried talking to him, assuring him that zombies aren’t real (CDC page notwithstanding). We’ve helped him look out the window, to let him see that there’s nothing out there. We leave his lights on all night, so he’s not afraid of the darkness. We bought him a dream catcher, to help “keep the nightmares away.” I taught him to be a “dream warrior,” to take control of any bad dreams he may have. His Kindergarten teacher even got in on it, having the class make a poster of suggestions for what he could do, to stop being so afraid. In short, we’ve really, really tried to help him, but for whatever reason, he just hasn’t been able to overcome this fear.
After a week or two of very, very long nights, it finally occurred to me to offer him a Priesthood blessing. (No clue why it didn’t occur to me before that, but I digress.) After all the things we’d tried, after all the logic we’d used, this finally did the trick. That night, he slept pretty much through the night, and things started improving from there. It humbled me. It made him happy. It was a win/win situation—or so I thought.
Since that night, David has almost invariably refused to go to bed until he’s had another Priesthood blessing. This has happened almost every single night, pretty much the only exceptions being the nights that he and his sister have had “sleepovers” on one of their floors. As such, I’ve now blessed David some 30-40 times for the exact same thing. I’ve tried to explain to him that he only needs one blessing, that the additional blessings don’t add anything to the first, but his five-year-old mind just won’t accept that. I’ve tried to pray with him, instead; I think that worked once, but otherwise, it’s never enough unless I also give him a blessing. To be honest, the blessings are getting quite rote, without nearly as much Spiritual influence as I feel a Priesthood blessing should have. (How could they not be so, after 30-40 of them?)
So here, in the midst of my beautiful little boy’s cry for help, is my own cry for help: what do I do about this? How do I help him understand that he doesn’t need yet another Priesthood blessing? How can I help him understand that there’s a point of diminishing returns—or is there, given the results of the continual blessings? How can I help him understand that there is power in the Priesthood and that Heavenly Father and I are always always always willing to give him a blessing when he needs it, but that he really doesn’t need any more blessings for the exact same thing? Or does he? They are working, after all. I’m really at a loss, here.
Please comment on this. As I said above, I could really use some help, here.
Thanks in advance!
About two months ago, my five-year-old son, David, suddenly became terrified of the dark, of going upstairs by himself, and of going to bed by himself. (He’s our only living son, so he’s been going to bed by himself since he was an infant.) At first, he was afraid of zombies; these days, he’s just plain afraid, ostensibly without the ability to articulate just what it is that scares him. Either way, the problem is the same: we have a lot of trouble getting him to go to bed.
We’ve tried talking to him, assuring him that zombies aren’t real (CDC page notwithstanding). We’ve helped him look out the window, to let him see that there’s nothing out there. We leave his lights on all night, so he’s not afraid of the darkness. We bought him a dream catcher, to help “keep the nightmares away.” I taught him to be a “dream warrior,” to take control of any bad dreams he may have. His Kindergarten teacher even got in on it, having the class make a poster of suggestions for what he could do, to stop being so afraid. In short, we’ve really, really tried to help him, but for whatever reason, he just hasn’t been able to overcome this fear.After a week or two of very, very long nights, it finally occurred to me to offer him a Priesthood blessing. (No clue why it didn’t occur to me before that, but I digress.) After all the things we’d tried, after all the logic we’d used, this finally did the trick. That night, he slept pretty much through the night, and things started improving from there. It humbled me. It made him happy. It was a win/win situation—or so I thought.
Since that night, David has almost invariably refused to go to bed until he’s had another Priesthood blessing. This has happened almost every single night, pretty much the only exceptions being the nights that he and his sister have had “sleepovers” on one of their floors. As such, I’ve now blessed David some 30-40 times for the exact same thing. I’ve tried to explain to him that he only needs one blessing, that the additional blessings don’t add anything to the first, but his five-year-old mind just won’t accept that. I’ve tried to pray with him, instead; I think that worked once, but otherwise, it’s never enough unless I also give him a blessing. To be honest, the blessings are getting quite rote, without nearly as much Spiritual influence as I feel a Priesthood blessing should have. (How could they not be so, after 30-40 of them?)
So here, in the midst of my beautiful little boy’s cry for help, is my own cry for help: what do I do about this? How do I help him understand that he doesn’t need yet another Priesthood blessing? How can I help him understand that there’s a point of diminishing returns—or is there, given the results of the continual blessings? How can I help him understand that there is power in the Priesthood and that Heavenly Father and I are always always always willing to give him a blessing when he needs it, but that he really doesn’t need any more blessings for the exact same thing? Or does he? They are working, after all. I’m really at a loss, here.
Please comment on this. As I said above, I could really use some help, here.
Thanks in advance!
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