A Conversion Story (Part V)
(Coming in late? Start from the beginning!)
Praying for the first time is an interesting experience, especially when, like me, you haven’t received any guidance.
“God?” I began. “I don’t know if you’re there.” (long pause) “And if you are there, I don’t know if you’re listening.” (long pause) “And if you are listening, I don’t know if you care.” (long pause) “But I’m sorry.” I ran down every sinful thing I could think of in my entire life, begging Heavenly Father for forgiveness, and when I finally got done, finished up with “…and if there’s anything else that I’ve forgotten, I’m sorry for that, too.”
I have never felt the Spirit as strongly as I did, that day. Joseph Smith, Jr. taught that when the Holy Ghost comes upon a Gentile (one who is not a literal descendant of Israel), it has the effect of purging the Gentile blood from his being and replacing it with the blood of the covenant. I don’t know if that’s what happened to me, that morning—if I understand my Patriarchal Blessing correctly, I actually am a natural-born descendant of Israel—but I can’t imagine that that would have been any more intense than what I did experience. In the immortal words of Albert Einstein, “Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That’s relativity.” I lay there for what seemed like hours, but was probably more like fifteen seconds. I was wholly unable to move, literally and completely paralyzed by the immenseness of the power that had suddenly come over my entire body. And finally, just when I thought I couldn’t take any more, I passed out.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve rarely slept past about 9:00 a.m.. On this occasion, though, I didn’t wake up until after one in the afternoon—a wholly unprecedented slumber. I realized something big was going on, and just as certainly, I knew that I had to do something about it. I immediately headed downstairs to the computer.
As I logged onto the Internet to write Anna, a million thoughts rushed through my mind. What was this power that had come over me? Was it the God I’d been so unsure existed? I told her everything that had happened and finally hit [Send], then called her and let the phone ring once—our signal that new mail had arrived. It wasn’t long before she got back to me, asking simply, “Do you think you’d like to meet with the missionaries?” I responded quite quickly, “I think that would be a good idea.” She then sent my name and address to her friend Aimee, who lived in the same mission as me. About 6:00 that night, Aimee logged onto Prodigy, found the reference, printed it out, and brought it upstairs to the missionaries who were over for dinner.
Tune in next time for Part VI!
“And the presence of God withdrew from Moses, that his glory was not upon Moses; and Moses was left unto himself. And as he was left unto himself, he fell unto the earth. And it came to pass that it was for the space of many hours before Moses did again receive his natural strength like unto man; and he said unto himself: Now, for this cause I know that man is nothing, which thing I never had supposed” (Moses 1:9-10).
Praying for the first time is an interesting experience, especially when, like me, you haven’t received any guidance.
“God?” I began. “I don’t know if you’re there.” (long pause) “And if you are there, I don’t know if you’re listening.” (long pause) “And if you are listening, I don’t know if you care.” (long pause) “But I’m sorry.” I ran down every sinful thing I could think of in my entire life, begging Heavenly Father for forgiveness, and when I finally got done, finished up with “…and if there’s anything else that I’ve forgotten, I’m sorry for that, too.”
I have never felt the Spirit as strongly as I did, that day. Joseph Smith, Jr. taught that when the Holy Ghost comes upon a Gentile (one who is not a literal descendant of Israel), it has the effect of purging the Gentile blood from his being and replacing it with the blood of the covenant. I don’t know if that’s what happened to me, that morning—if I understand my Patriarchal Blessing correctly, I actually am a natural-born descendant of Israel—but I can’t imagine that that would have been any more intense than what I did experience. In the immortal words of Albert Einstein, “Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That’s relativity.” I lay there for what seemed like hours, but was probably more like fifteen seconds. I was wholly unable to move, literally and completely paralyzed by the immenseness of the power that had suddenly come over my entire body. And finally, just when I thought I couldn’t take any more, I passed out.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve rarely slept past about 9:00 a.m.. On this occasion, though, I didn’t wake up until after one in the afternoon—a wholly unprecedented slumber. I realized something big was going on, and just as certainly, I knew that I had to do something about it. I immediately headed downstairs to the computer.
As I logged onto the Internet to write Anna, a million thoughts rushed through my mind. What was this power that had come over me? Was it the God I’d been so unsure existed? I told her everything that had happened and finally hit [Send], then called her and let the phone ring once—our signal that new mail had arrived. It wasn’t long before she got back to me, asking simply, “Do you think you’d like to meet with the missionaries?” I responded quite quickly, “I think that would be a good idea.” She then sent my name and address to her friend Aimee, who lived in the same mission as me. About 6:00 that night, Aimee logged onto Prodigy, found the reference, printed it out, and brought it upstairs to the missionaries who were over for dinner.
Tune in next time for Part VI!
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